as the sky darkens at night

I’m freaked out Freaked out about jumping in and having to run away wet. I’m scared but not wanting to show it. I’m wondering which way to go and who will be there to point me in the direction that I will probably pick the other to go in. I’m going to miss my cat and the veggies my small group of friends, flower outside my window, my bike. I’m going to miss this home, this space. I know I’ll miss her also the used to be lover now friend. I’m freaked out with the what if’s I’m scared about the big shops and not having my aunt the way I remember. I’m scared about the government and cry for peace. But, I must move on, I must cross the ocean and fill my soul with songs and love. I must believe that love will find a way into my heart to stay. I have hope it just sometimes get filled with scared bubbles that fill my inside as tears come down my face. I’m ready to have some stability in my life. Something to hold onto, someone to hold onto as the stars appear as the sky darkens at night and someone who will still be there as the bright new day begins. I’m scared, I’m freaked out and I have hope. I have soul filled love for this one.